


The Dream We Shared

by Darling_Rebel



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood and Gore, Comfort/Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hydra (Marvel), Lots of Angst, Marvel Universe, Near Death Experiences, Protective Bucky, Reader Insert, Reader-Insert, Self Insert, Survival of the Fittest, TRUST NO ONE, Trials, Violence, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, bonding with bucky, intimidating but gentle bucky, is the best bucky
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2018-12-20 17:23:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11925633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darling_Rebel/pseuds/Darling_Rebel
Summary: Abducted and brainwashed, you've been taken from your life of normalcy and thrown into a world where only one can make it out alive. You and several other 'candidates' must survive a series of demented trials to see which of you will be the new 'Light of Mankind'.Death lurks behind every corner but with the help of your masked Guardian, you might just survive.





	1. (Prologue) The Nameless Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “But if she passes all of the tests and trials she will be another light, another gift to mankind.”

 

 _“The caged bird sings with a fearful trill,_  
_of things unknown but longed for still,_  
_and his tune is heard on the distant hill,_  
_for the caged bird sings of freedom."_  
— _Maya Angelou_

_ (I Know the Caged Bird Sings) _

 

~

 

_“Your work has been a gift to mankind.”_

 

     The man’s factual voice broke the stiff silence that hung in the dark office. He stared down at the illuminated city below him. The massive windows of the Triskelion tower gave him a perfect view of the faceless humans that hustled about. Even in the late hours of night people were still bustling around, each living their own busy and individual life. The suited man sneered at the petty ants below him then turned to walk to the table in the middle of the room.

     “But humans are atrocious and selfish beings; they never appreciate the liberty and freedom they are given,” the Secretary paused to let his claim sink in.

     “The world is a terrible place. It’s full of violence and war and even though we do our best to keep peace, the world doesn’t want it. Humans crave chaos and will do anything to create it,” his voice dripped with poisonous contempt but the man sitting at the end of the table had never been afraid of snakes.

     “Once again, the world desires anarchy. It’s our job to right the wrongs of those who disturb peace and order. But now things are different, the wrong doers outnumber the righteous and we need more allies,” his words seemed to have caught the attention of the dark figure that sat at the other end of the table.

     “A group of special young adults have been chosen for the testing and trials that will determine who is worthy. Each officer has been assigned a candidate,” the captious man pulled out a manila folder then slid it down to the man concealed in the shadows.

     “She’s yours,” the councilman stated as the hidden figure took the folder and flipped it open.

     The man examined the file and looked at the picture attached to the sheets of information. His face was covered by a pair of goggles and mask but he could see the photo of the girl and her face intrigued him.

     “You are to see that she stays alive and is protected from the other candidates that might try to kill her. Don’t worry, you won’t be babysitting her, if she fails one of the trials she will be deemed unworthy and disposed of,” the suited man informed with a monotone voice.

     “But, if she passes all of the tests and trials she will be another light, another gift to mankind.”

     Once the head of the World Security Council had finished, the masked figure rose from his seat and made his way towards the door. Then he heard the salute had been said for as long as he could remember;

 

_Hail Hydra._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone!! :DD  
> Some of you may recognize this work as one of my first series which I had taken down after a few chpts. I received a lot of messages about this series and the reason I took it down is because I didn't know where I wanted to go with it and I didn't see an end in sight. As an avid reader myself, I can confidently say that there is nothing more heartbreaking than an orphaned series. Since I didn't know where the piece was going, I took it down rather than to leave it incomplete.   
> After having time to outline the entire plot and come up with the ending, I've decided to repost it! I've made some MAJOR changes to the plot and storyline so it's pretty different from its predecessor!   
> Please enjoy! ^7^)/


	2. United and Labeled Under One Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “She needed more than the others, but maybe she needs even more…”

 

 _"Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness."  
-_ _Alejandro Jodorowsky_

_~_

_You had never liked the color yellow._

_‘Wait, that’s yellow, right? Or is it blue? Maybe green?’_

     The confusion made your head throb, causing you to drop the subject. The old light bulbs hanging from the concrete ceiling casted small, musty, yellow spotlights and did little to illuminate the long, confining hallway. Every spot of light was followed by a spot of darkness but the constant change didn’t bother you. There wasn't much else to look at. It was difficult to see what was around you because of the four men dressed in all black that surrounded you, two in front of you and two in back. They hadn’t said anything to you but you didn’t really mind. You enjoyed the feeling of the cold concrete beneath you and admired the white gown you wore. It was just above your knees and you smiled amusingly as the material twirled around your form as you walked. Upon closer inspection, you noticed that there was a flat, metallic, silver strip of metal with a serial number on the inner area of your calf. It was fairly long and clung to your flesh but it didn’t hurt nor was it uncomfortable _._

 _‘It’s kind of like a cold, shiny piece of second skin. I've never noticed it before. Did I always have it there? Was I bor-‘_ your thoughts were cut short when you felt a throbbing pain in your head. You halted your thoughts and decided to shift your focus.

 _‘This place is like a maze…’_ you thought as you and the men dressed in black turned yet another corner. You scrunched your nose as the air became more and more stuffy.

     ' _Feels like I’m breathing in dust,’_ you thought as fought back the urge to sneeze and luckily won.

     The four men surrounding you stopped in front of a massive white door. Its pristine condition stood in stark contrast with the old and grayed hallways. The two men in front of you began pressing buttons on the panel next to the door then pressed their bare hand against a panel until it flashed green. The doors unlocked then opened with a heavy groan. The two men in front of you held open the door then jerked their heads in the direction of the room, nonverbally ordering you to enter. The florescent white light that came from within the room blinded you, overwhelming your senses. You winced then brought your hands to your face to shield your sensitive eyes. You took a step back then felt something cold press against your back. You looked over your shoulder and saw that one of the men behind you had pressed the tip of a weird black thing against you. You didn’t know exactly what it was…

    _'But those aren’t good are they?’_

     The man pushed you forward with the cold tip of the handheld machine. Having no choice but to endure the pain, you forced yourself to enter the blindingly white room. Your sensitive eyes eventually adjusted to the over illumination as you advanced further into the room. The two men closely followed you, fully prepared to ‘encourage’ you if you hesitated again. You looked over your shoulder to watch the large doors close shut and a thick lock fall into place. You flinched when you heard another click and felt a familiar cold metal press against your back. Their message was loud and clear and left you with no other option than to continue walking forward.

     At the center of the room was an elevated, cylindrical platform with three rings of stairs surrounding it. As you got closer you saw that there were people standing in a crescent formation around the bottom ring of the steps. There was an empty space at the center of the curved line of people; the men lowered their cold machines when you had filled it. You looked around and saw that there were two types of people: people in white gowns like you and two men dressed in black behind each of them. You openly stared at the people in white gowns. They were young men and women, all were around your age. They were all so diverse; different heights, eye and hair color, skin color, facial features, and body types but all of them wore the same gown. Your thoughts were cut short by the thunderous sound of a large door opening.

     You watched as a person ascended the stairs then stepped unto the final platform behind the podium. Before you stood a man wearing a suit. He was well into his fifties; his paling, dirty blonde hair as well as the lines and wrinkles on his face were proof of it. The man’s thick glasses did nothing to hide the unchallengeable authority in his icy blue eyes. His calculative eyes examined every person wearing a white gown below him. Then his gaze stopped on you. The man’s pale blue eyes pierced through your soul. The intensity of his gaze made you want to squirm and break eye contact but you stood tall and forced yourself to return his gaze. You wanted him to know that you weren’t the type of gal who was easily intimidated. You saw his eyebrows knit together in disapproval but it vanished as quickly as it came. He pulled himself out of his trance then turned his attention to the others in the room.

     “Welcome Gifts!” the man greeted with outstretched arms and a smile.

     A smile was meant to be a pleasant and welcoming gesture but you felt something sinister behind his grin. Then you pondered his greeting _._

 _'Wait. What does he mean by ‘Gifts’? Is that us? Is that what we’re called? Is that our name? We all share the same name? Is that possible? Is it even right? To be lumped together and addressed under one name? Shouldn’t w-‘_ before you could finish your thoughts you felt a stab of sharp pain in your head. You managed to maintain a straight face but you seemed to have caught the suited man’s attention.

     “Humans are horrible and violent beings,” the aged man stated in a poisonous tone.

     “They crave chaos and cannot function without it. The righteous have always tried to maintain peace but the world has never wanted it. The history of mankind is nothing but one war after another. Humanity cannot be trusted with its own freedom. Humanity needs to surrender its freedom willingly in order for peace to be possible.”

      You stared up at the man with wide eyes, most of his words confused you but you knew that something was very, _very_ wrong. Another sharp pain shot through your head, forcing you to continue listening to his deranged monologue.

     “But among all the scum of the world, you-the pure and unadulterated youth-will be the future of the world. You will be the immaculate hand that wipes the filthy pages of history clean. Each of you will undergo a series of tests and trials to determine who is worthy of that honor. Whomever passes all of them will be the light, the beacon, the gift to mankind,” the man finished his sermon of twisted reality with outstretched arms.

     From the corner of your eye you looked around to see the reactions of the other ‘candidates’. Some wore expressions of awe and fascination, while others looked inspired and determined to be _‘the gift to mankind’._ You on the other hand, found the entire concept bizarre. Your mind was hazy and for some reason, you weren’t able to retain everything he said. Something told you not to stand out, to mimic the expressions of the others, so you did.

     “Each of you have been assigned a ‘guardian’. They will teach you how to better yourself as a candidate. When they arrive, they will escort you to your assigned room,” the bizarre man informed and on cue, the door behind you opened. The two men behind every candidate moved aside as a group of men and women in black entered the room. You watched as each ‘guardian’ stood behind their assigned candidate.

     “Your training for the trials begins tomorrow so rest well. And remember, only one of you can be the gift to mankind,” the man’s voice dropped several octaves but the guardians gave their candidates little time to process his words as they ushered the young adults out the door.

     You looked around and saw that you were the only one without a guardian. You heard footsteps approaching then turned to see a tall man swaggering towards you. His skin was tan with countless scars covering his strong arms. His head was tilted back as he looked down at you with his predatory brown eyes. His gawking annoyed you, if he thought you were going to cower under his gaze, he was a fool. You met his eyes head on and stood your ground.

     “Are _you_ my guardian?” you demanded to know, doing nothing to hide the aggression and irritation in your voice.

     The brunette man smirked at your defiance, apparently enjoying it. He eyed you up and down, as if he were examining the quality of a meat at the market. Then he let out a dark chuckle.

     “Unfortunately not sweetheart,” he answered with a cocky smirk.

     “Rumlow!” a voice behind you barked. The newly named man leered at you one last time then winked, causing you to snarl at the bastard. Your glare followed him as he walked to the owner of the voice.

     “Gift 516,” the voice called.

     You didn’t know what ‘Gift 516’ was but when you heard him say it again you turned in the direction of the voice and saw it was the same man who had given the speech. You tilted your head then pointed to yourself, non-verbally asking if he was addressing you. The suited man nodded then approached you with another one of his haunting smiles.

 _‘It’s almost as if his face wasn’t made for smiling…’_ you thought to yourself has you tried not to grimace.

     The authoritative man stood in front of you and examined your face in deep concentration just like before. Just like earlier, you kept eye contact with the intimidating man but removed all defiance from your gaze. You knew that this man was not one to be challenged; at least not yet. He gazed down at you for what felt like an eternity. It was like he was waiting for you to do something. He snapped out of his trance when you raised an eyebrow in confusion.

     “I apologize for the tardiness of your guardian Gift 516. He should be returning from his mission any moment now.”

 _‘Wait. So my name is ‘Gift 516’? What does that mean? And mission? Why were none of the other guardians on a mission? What makes mine different? Wha-‘_ yet again your thoughts were cut short by another sharp pain in your head but this one was far stronger than the others.

     You let out a wince then your hand shot up to cradle the side of your head. Too distraught by the pain, you failed to notice the aged man’s pleasant expression had dropped and was replaced by an intimidating and calculative stare. Once the pain had faded, you looked up at him and his ghastly smile returned. The uncanny man called for a guard.

     “Take Gift 516 to the waiting room,” he ordered then turned to you, “Your guardian will meet you there,” he explained with a wider than necessary smile, you returned the gesture but in a more natural way as the guard escorted you out of the white room. Once you turned your back, the suited man’s face fell back into its unpleasant resting expression.

     “Mr. Secretary, isn’t 200 the highest dosage?” Rumlow asked as he joined the titled man in watching your receding form.

     “She needed more than the others, but maybe she needs even more…” the suited man thought out loud. He narrowed his eyes at your figure as you exited the room.

     “But chances are it wasn’t enough. Keep an eye on her Rumlow,” the Secretary ordered.

     The armed man huffed in amusement, “No problem,” the cocky brunette replied with a smirk, causing the stern man to turn to his subordinate.

     “Gift 516 isn’t yours. She belongs to the Soldier and I advise against toying with what is his,” the Secretary sternly warned.

     Once he was sure his warning had been heeded, the Secretary turned on his heel then exited the room. Rumlow stared down at his gun then deemed it wise to heed his superior’s warning. He knew that no weapon could protect him from the Soldier’s wrath.

 

     The guard led you through the multiple twists and turns of the maze-like building. Once the destination had been reached, the man unlocked the door then jerked his head inside the room. You took the hint and entered the small dusty room. Once inside, the thick door slammed shut then the lock clicked into place. You looked around the old and poorly lit room and noted that there were no other doors or any other ways to exit the room. The only light in the room came from an old, yellowish light bulb that hung from the ceiling. For the first time since entering, you noticed there was a small wooden table with a glass of water under the light. You walked over to inspect the glass and failed to register the quiet groan of the door opening. You reached out to take the glass but quickly retracted your hand and took a step back. A fresh cup of water in an empty room was highly suspicious…then you remember the words of the suited man.

     ‘Only _one_ of you may become the gift to mankind.’

     You couldn’t see any poison in the water but you weren’t about to take a chance. You had no desire in becoming ‘the gift to mankind’, but had every intention of living to see the next day. Your attention turned to the old, pale yellow walls. At first glance there was nothing special about it but that changed when you examined the wall closely. You ran your fingers over the poorly covered dents and cracks in the wall then felt your fingers brush up against a thin piece of poorly placed wallpaper. Curiosity overwhelmed you, causing you to dig your fingernails into the the paper's edges. With one hard yank, you ripped off the wallpaper and immediately regretted it. Your hands flew up to cover your mouth and silence your scream. The exposed wall before was covered in massive splatters of blood. You tried to think of what had happened in the room before you had entered it but before you could, an excruciating pain shot through your head.

     It was far worse than all the others combined. This time the pain pulsated through your entire body. Disoriented from the pain, you lost your balance and your body fell back against the wall with a harsh thud. The throbbing only intensified. Your legs to gave out and you plummeted to your knees, bruising the tender flesh. Tears poured from your eyes as you continued to cry out. You cradled your head in your trembling hands. You weren’t sure how much longer you could bare the pain. You clutched your chest in hopes of regulating your erratic breathing but failed as you felt yourself on the verge of passing out. The throbbing was unbearable and you begged your body to give up as you leaned back against the cold wall in defeat.

    Everything began to fade to black. Through the thick tears pouring from your eyes, you saw a dark figure approach you. It stopped and knelt in front of your weakened body then reached out to touch you. You should have felt scared, but the warmth of the figure’s hand soothed you and you allowed yourself to close your eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chpt woot! (ﾉ^ヮ^)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧  
> So pretty much what I've been doing is deconstructing the plot then removing and adding new/different elements. I've written several different drafts for the ending and am pleased to announce that I've chosen one! ヽ(*´∀`)ﾉﾞ  
> I ask for your patience since I'm also writing the latest chpt in TTaFH and two one-shots! Everything will be posted ASAP!!!
> 
> Please Kudo/comment to let me know what ya think! ;DD


	3. Typewriter and Fatal Deceptions

 

_"There is no greater sorrow,_

_than to recall in misery,_

_the time when we were happy."_

_-Dante Alighieri_

 

~

 

_If there’s a difference between dreams and reality,_

_Your ignorance is bliss._

      _You stared up at the endless blue that stretched as far as your eyes could see. It wasn’t a ceiling...no, it was far too pretty to be a ceiling. A ceiling is something that could be touched and measured but the blue expanse above you was something too otherworldly for the human hands to reach. There were fluffy white puffs scattered across the blue expanse. You smiled at their cute and unique shapes. A small glowing orb illuminated everything around you. It was nothing like the old light bulbs you had grown used to. No, this was unlike anything you had ever seen. The light from the orb was warm and welcoming and you never wanted to be without its comforting glow. The air you inhaled was crisp and clean, the complete opposite of the dusty, stale air you had been forced to inhale. A gust of air caused your hair to swirl around you. You closed your eyes and enjoyed the feeling of the air brushing your (h/c) strands from your face. Beneath you was a plethora of green strands and along side them, ornate, brightly colored shapes danced in the breeze. You enjoyed the sensation of the green blades lightly brushing up against your ankles and the coolness of the ground beneath you. The diversity of the pretty shapes was breathtaking. So many forms and colors you couldn’t even name. Never had you ever seen anything like this. Everything was so beautiful._

_You heard a voice and turned your head to find its owner. It was a woman but because of the distance, you couldn’t see or hear her properly. She waved in your direction and called out a pretty word. Her (h/c) hair swirled around her as she smiled and cupped her hands around her mouth to call it again but the melodious word was carried away by the breeze. The woman waved to you and pointed to the blue expanse above. Unfortunately, because of the distance between the two of you, it was impossible to hear her clearly._

_“…hurry…come...see the…’irds!”_

_You heard a soft noise then looked up to see a flock of white animals fly up into the air. You watched in awe as they flew higher and higher into the endless blue. The freedom the flying creatures possessed filled you with a sorrowful envy. You would give anything to admire everything from above and to be free to go wherever you please. The woman called out the pretty word once again. You closed your eyes in hopes of hearing her better but to no avail. You settled on taking in the magnificence of everything around you._

_‘Everything is so beautiful.’_

 

     “So beautiful…” you whispered as your eyes fluttered open.

     But instead of the pretty blue expanse, you saw a flaky, old ceiling above you. Instead of the warm and shining orb you saw the light of a musty bulbs hanging from the ceiling. The dust covered bulb filled the room with an unpleasant yellowish-white illumination. Instead of the fresh air and cool breeze, you inhaled the stale air of the medium sized room you found yourself in. Sorrow and disappointment filled you as you realized it was all just a dream _._

 _‘Was all of it even a real place? I’ve never seen anything like it…maybe it was all the play of my imagination…’_ you bitterly accepted reality as you sat up to examine the room you were in. A thin, coarse white sheet laid in your lap and the mattress below you was horrendously stiff.

_‘Did everything happen yesterday? Or was all that a dream as well?’_

     Your inner clock was out of whack and time didn’t seem to exist in this place. You felt a familiar dull pain in your head and forced yourself to drop the subject and focus on taking in more of your surroundings.

     Just like the hallway, the walls of the room were made of a bumpy, brick pattern. There was a long black panel near the thick metal door and you wondered what its purpose was. You looked behind you and saw a large, brown wooden desk with shelves and a similarly styled chair in front of it. There were objects all over the desk and set on the shelves. The many knick-knacks on the shelves of the desk stroked your curiosity. You turned your head to the right then froze.

    On the other side of the room was a man sitting on the edge of a bed. His strong arms were crossed over his chest as he stared at you. Well, at least you guessed that he was staring at you. His entire face was covered by a pair of goggles and a mask. He was dressed head to toe in all black and his clothes were very strange. It was more of a protective suit for combat rather than something that would be worn for everyday tasks. The man’s unkept chin length brunette hair was parted down the middle and you couldn’t help but admire the way it looked in the light. The strangest thing about the man was his left arm which was made of metal. His metal limb made him look even more frightening and intimidating. You knew you should be afraid of him but for some reason…you weren’t. You couldn’t see his eyes or anything else but you left like he was staring at you with curiosity and interest. It was as if he was waiting for you to do or say something; so you did.

     “Who are you?” you asked in a small voice.

     Your voice was still raspy from sleep and you felt embarrassed that your tone sounded so unpleasant. The man stared at you for what felt like an eternity before standing up and walking to the desk. He held out a glass of water and patiently waited for you to take it. You stared at it for a moment, remembering how you felt about the last glass of water you had seen. A strange thought came to mind as you gazed up at his masked face:

_‘This man will never harm me…’_

Your body reacted on its own as you slowly reached out to take the glass. Your fingers brushed against his gloved hand but he didn’t seem to have felt it. The man watched you as you took a sip of the cool water. You hummed as you felt it sooth your scorched throat. Before you could expressed your gratitude, the man had vanished into the small room adjoined to the one you were in. He returned with some tissue paper and held it out to you. You looked at the tissue in confusion then looked up at him, questioning his intentions. The intimidating man pointed to his cheek. You mirrored his action and realized that your cheeks were wet.

_‘I must have been crying in my sleep…’_

     You turned to look at your pillow and saw wet spots on the material, proof that you had been crying. You blushed in embarrassment then quickly wiped your tears as you thanked the man once again for his kindness. Once your tears had been dried you looked up at the brunette.

     “Are you my guardian?” you asked in a quiet voice.

     The masked man gave a curt nod as an answer. You looked down and smiled in relief. The man was intimidating and didn’t talk much but you felt safe around him and were grateful for that. Your gaze returned to his hidden face and you wondered what his face looked like under his mask and goggles. He returned your stare and you knew he was taking in every detail of your face. Before you could say anything, the mysterious man walked over to the large wooden table and grabbed a small black machine and cloth from the drawer.

     You watched the man take it apart with expert hands and wipe away the grime and dirtiness with the old cloth. A few moments later, you decided to get out of bed and explore the small room. There wasn’t much to look at but you were good at finding ways to occupy yourself. You pulled the white sheet from your lap and swung your legs over the bed. It took a great amount of discipline and self-control not to jump out of bed. You knew getting up slowly was the best option considering you didn’t know how long you had been out. The frigid temperature of the concrete floor made you quickly retract your feet but you eventually got used to it. You look down and saw the giant purple-ish, blue bruises that covered both of your knees.

     “Did I pass out?” you asked as you ghosted your fingers over the colored flesh. The man nodded without looking away from his meticulous cleaning.

     “How long was I out?” you questioned. He remained silent.

     You wanted to ask him again but your action came to a sudden halt when an unwelcome, sharp pain shot through your head. You bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from crying out. Thankfully, the pain eventually faded. You looked down at your lap, then let out a breathless laugh.

     “Look at me, as fragile and breakable as glass. I’m sorry for being a burden, but thank you for taking care of me.”

     You hadn’t known the masked man for more than an hour nor had you yet to hear his voice but his small acts of kindness spoke volumes to you. He had draped a blanket over you when you were unconscious and had a glass of cool water waiting for you Your words of gratitude made the man halt is cleaning. He turned slightly to look at you. His face was covered but you knew that something was different about his stare. It was as if he had been caught off guard, or maybe confused by what you had said. The mysterious man stared at you for a few more moments before refocusing his attention to the black machine he had been putting back together. You smiled at him even though his back was turned to you then let out a huff of determination.

     You successfully lifted yourself from the bed but your triumph was short lived when your legs straightened and your weak knees weren’t able to support your weight. You let out a loud wince as your tender knees buckled and you stumbled. Luckily your reflexes were fast and you were able to catch yourself from falling while managing to stay in a standing position. Your hands rested on the mattress for extra support. You looked up when you heard a noise. The man was next to you with his arms outstretched, ready to catch you from falling to the hard, concrete floor. He offered his arms as a stable surface to lean and cling to if need be. Touched by his compassionate concern, you smiled brightly as you stood up straight.

    “Thank you so much for your help but no worries. I’m tougher than I look!” you beamed in a cheery voice as you gently punched the air beside you to prove your point.

    The man looked down at you and the aura around him seemed gentler, as if your little action had amused him. Before you could say anything else, the brunette turned and went back to the desk and started cleaning something else. Your curiosity overwhelmed you and caused you to walk over to the large wooden desk. Once you stood next to him, the masked man halted his cleaning and froze in place. You failed to notice his uneasiness and continued to investigate the object he held in his hands. The bottom half was black and the upper half was made of a shiny silver metal, the man’s cloth covered most of the steel but you knew it was lethally sharp. The man dressed in black resumed his cleaning and you watched for a few moments before turning your attention to the rest of the objects on the desk.

    “Is all this yours?” you asked but immediately regretted your question when you realized how stupid it was. Of course it’s all his! This is his room! You blushed in embarrassment and looked away before he could notice it.

    There were multiple volumes of bond paper standing vertically in one of the shelves, each with its own unique cover and font. On another was a thin folder filled with loose-leaf paper. Multiple utensils that seemed to be made for drawing and writing laid next to it. The knick-knacks on the table had your undivided attention but you could feel the man’s eyes watching you intently.

    “Do you like to write and draw?” you looked over your shoulder as you asked the man. He shrugged his broad shoulders in response.

    “Both?” you asked in amazement. The man grunted in response. Your eyes lit up. 

    “Wow! You’re so talented!” you exclaimed with sparkling eyes. The man stared at you. He seemed shocked at first but he eventually bowed his head. It seemed to be his own silent way of saying ‘thank you’.

    “Maybe you could show me your work someday?” you inquired in a bashful voice. An amused huff let the man as he nodded, much to your delight. Next to the sheets of paper was a coarse brown material covering and binding several pieces of paper together.

    “This is very pretty.” you complimented. The man nodded in thanks again then you continued your examination of the interesting knick-knacks. One specific object caught your attention. It was made mainly of metal with a single sheet of paper coiled in a roll at the top of the mechanism. It was covered in little buttons that looked like they were meant to be pressed. You resisted the urge to do so. 

     “I really like this, it looks very interesting,” your words were filled with wonder as you gazed down at the metal object on the table.

     The man looked at you again then leaned over and pressed one of the keys. You gasped in amazement as the button clicked and a black marking appeared on the paper.  Seeing your delight, the brunette typed out another marking.

     “That’s amazing!!” you squealed and clapped in delight as you hopped up and down.

     He let out an amused huff and continued typing more and more markings. When the first line was full the machine let out a loud ding then he pushed the roll back in its previous position and continued pressing the buttons. You placed your hands on your cheeks and gasped in amazement and gleefully watched as he continued typing.

     “What do those markings mean?” you questioned. The man dressed in black abruptly stopped and stared at you. The tense aura around him made you immediately regret your words.

     “Is it a secret? I don’t know what they mean so there’s no need to stop. I’m so sorry if I offended you,” you apologized, hoping your words would ease the man’s stiffened form.

     His shoulders dropped as he stared at you. His looked down at the metal machine then to you again. Before you could fall into despair, the man pulled out the chair for you to sit in. Your head shot up and you gave him a bright smile before setting yourself down in the wooden chair. You watched with sparkly eyes and the man typed out more and more markings.

     “I love the little click it makes,” you thought out loud.

     For several minutes the man stood in front of the wonderful mechanism and you watched from your chair as he continued to type and reset the paper. He had nearly reached the end of the paged when you felt your happiness being sapped away.

     “Was yesterday real?” you asked in a solemn whisper, completely devoid of all emotion. The brunette stopped writing and looked down at your confused and somewhat defeated form.

     Nothing seemed real. If there was a difference between reality and delusions you couldn’t tell which was which. You felt so disoriented and lost, not knowing what to trust and what to deem a lie. Nothing made sense. As you tried to complete the distorted picture of reality, you felt a pang of a familiar sharp pain shoot through your head. Your thoughts came to an abrupt halt when an ear-piercing siren pierced through the silence. You jolted from your chair, your heart did the same as the siren continued to wail. The man growled when the black panel next to the door lit up with red markings you couldn’t read. The markings to the far right were changing quickly, as if they were counting down to the start of something important. The now vexed man cleaned the last of his sharp metal blades and black machines then placed them in the various pockets of his suit.

 _‘How many does he have?’_ you thought, totally bewildered.

     Once he was done, the man gently grabbed your arm and pulled you from the chair. He walked you to the thick metal door which unlocked once the numbers had stopped and the room flashed red. The door opened and the masked man led you down the hall and through the maze-like building. He finally stopped in front of a white door that was guarded by two heavily armed men. The intimidating man jerked his head in your direction, the guards nodded, stepped aside to open the door, and let the two of you pass through.

     A blinding white light shone from the room and like before, you winced and raised your hands to cover your sensitive eyes. Just like before, you took a step back but unlike the guards from yesterday, the masked man allowed you to adjust to the brightness before entering the room. Once your eyes had adjusted, the brunette gently pushed on the small of your back and led you into the room. Inside the white room were a group of candidates and their guardians. There were less than the other day so you naively figured the other were probably somewhere else. There was one girl not too far away from you that caught your attention. The lovely girl had olive colored skin and voluminous, shining black hair. You approached the girl and complimented her gorgeous locks. Her mouth hung open then she covered her face with her hands and humbly disagreed with heavy accent at your expression of admiration.

    “No really! It looks like you’re wearing a halo of light!” you beamed in amazement as the flustered girl accepted and thanked you for your compliment.

     She then praised the beauty of your (e/c) eyes and you placed your hand on your chest, truly touched by her kind words and thanked her. The rest of the pleasant conversation was spent giving and receiving compliments while smiling and laughing.

     The stoic man looked at you and smiled behind his mask. It intrigued and amused him that you were so outgoing and friendly, but part of him wasn’t surprised.

     The lovely exchange was shattered when a cocky young man approached you. He eyed you up and down as if you were a piece of meat and smirked. You made your disgust obvious and the once sweet girl turned horrifically bitter at his lewd mannerism. He was about to open his filthy mouth to say something vile but before he could, he looked over your shoulder and shut his mouth immediately. You looked behind you and saw your ever-intimidating guardian glaring down the young man. The masked man’s gloved hands were balled into fists as his hidden eyes bore into the young man’s soul. The once cocky adolescent cowered under your guardian’s glare. He eventually lost it and scurried away. Once he was gone you and the pretty girl burst into a fit of giggles. When you had had your laugh, you smiled brightly at your guardian as you thanked him. The aura around him calmed then he acknowledged your thanks with a small nod. You and the girl continued chatting as your Guardian stood behind you, ready to stare down any other young men who might try to ‘flirt’ with you.

     Your conversation came to an abrupt halt when the door at the front of the room opened. A suited man entered the room followed by two armed men. It wasn’t the same man from the other day but he had the same strange aura around him. You braced yourself for whatever bizarre sermon he may give.

     “Welcome Gifts!” the man greeted in an overexcited tone.

     “Today will be one of the many trials you will need to successfully complete in order to be become the immaculate gift to mankind.”

     You cringed at his bizarre words and glanced at the girl beside you who wore the same expression.

     “The instructions of the trial will be given once you step through this door,” the overzealous man explained as he gestured to the door beside the one he had entered through.

     One by one, the candidates entered the trial room but you lingered near the back of the group, uneasy about what was waiting for you on the other side. You noticed that the guardians were staying behind. You looked over to yours. Fearful tears began to form in your eyes when as you realized you'd be without his protection. You followed the group but kept your eyes on him the whole time. You barely knew the man but he was kind at heart and you felt safe around him; but without him you felt small and vulnerable. Something about this place was twisted and terrifying but with the silent man you felt like you had someone who would always have your back, but now...

     Your eyes only left his masked face when you entered the room and the door was shut behind you, leaving you completely at the mercy of the trial.

 _‘You’re on your own…’_ you told yourself.

     The room you entered was dimly lit by a single white light hanging from the ceiling. The tiny bulb was only bright enough to illuminate the wall in front of you, making the room feel unbearably small and you claustrophobic. The suited man’s voice began explaining the instructions of the trial but he was nowhere in sight. His voice seemed to be coming from the ceiling above you. 

     “The first trial will test you reasoning skills. As the light of mankind, you will need to be able to make immediate decisions under extreme pressure. The righteous are always be put in difficult situation so it is essential that you learn how to survive in a hostile environment.”

 _‘Wait…survive? Hostile environment?’_ you thought to yourself in bewilderment. Panic began to brew deep inside you.

     Nothing he said made sense but when you tried to put the pieces together, the unwelcome pain in your head returned. You gritted your teeth and forced yourself to focus on the man’s voice but a sudden, loud bang from behind you caught your attention. The banging continued then you heard something on the other side of the door snarl and howl. Panic began to grow inside you. You knew something was coming, something bad. You looked around the room for your pretty friend but the room was too dim and packed to see anyone.

     “The test begins in five seconds, the instructions are simple; line up at the yellow line on the floor, and when the wall in front of you lifts off the ground… ** _run._** ”

     Everything that happened after that was a blur of chaos and panic. Before you had time to register his words the wall lifted and you saw a narrow white hallway in front of you then heard another door burst open. The growling grew louder and louder as a pack of…something advanced towards you. You snapped your head to look behind you and saw that a pack of massive, mutated, wild beasts covered in black fur run into the light. Their grotesque and oversized jaws stretched to the back of their necks. Black saliva dripped from their mouths. The beasts’ razor sharp teeth shone in the light and their long and powerful legs with spear like claws sunk into the concrete below them. Their black eyes fixated themselves on the defenseless humans before them. Ravenous for flesh, the pack broke out into a sprint and headed straight for the group of candidates.

    Every candidate froze in horror, too shocked to move a single muscle. You were the first to react. Only one word rang through your otherwise blank mind;

 

**_Run._ **

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm on a roll today woot! (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ̑̑  
> Thank you everyone for your support it courage to continue writing so thank you for that!! (♡ >ω< ♡)
> 
> Regarding the chpt:  
> -It was actually really challenging to describe and open field without using any nouns. I actually did some research on how to describe things to individuals who are visually impaired to help me write this chpt!  
> -I had a lot of fun coming up with and writing all the lil knick-knacks Bucky owns!
> 
> Next chpt will be up ASAP! Thanks for reading!! ♥（ﾉ´∀`）


	4. Don't Trust the Doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the moment he had met you, he had loved your smile but now he hated it with a passion.

_“Fear is the venom impact of predator sting,_  
causing prey not to focus on survival.”   
\- _Toba Beta_

_My Ancestor Was an Ancient Astronaut_

_~_

_It was horror that paralyzed you,_

_But panic that slapped you back to reality._

     You threw all human reasoning out the window then shifted your mental gears into survival mode as you bolted down the narrow hallway. The blinding white color of the walls made your eyes water but the thunderous snarling and barking booming through the hall made your legs lengthen their strides.

     You heard a shriek and regretted looking over your shoulder. The young man who had tried to flirt with you fell to the ground with a harsh thud when one of the beasts had sunk its spear-like teeth into his ankle. The young man’s screams grew louder and louder as the rest of the pack ate him alive. It was when the hall went silent, everyone knew he was dead. You tore your eyes away from the gory scene but the sight of his remains had been burned into your memory. You were still in the lead, the furthest from the bloodthirsty pack but you knew you wouldn’t be safe until you found the exit; if there was one. You heard more screams and flesh being torn from bone, making you force your body to move faster.

     At the end of the hallway was a fork that split the hall into two paths with a door at the end of each of them. The path on the left led to an empty room while the room on the right had a person on the other side of the door.

     “Over here! Come over here quick they’re right behind you! Come over here you’ll be safe!” they yelled.

     Common sense told you to choose that path but something didn’t feel right. You trusted your gut instinct and prayed you wouldn’t regret it as you sprinted towards the door on the right. When you were about to turn the corner, you were slammed into the wall by another candidate who hoped that your body would satisfy the beasts’ hunger and buy him some time. The wind was knocked out of you and you heard something crack as you fell to your knees with a harsh thud. The already bruised flesh of your knees took yet again another fall and you knew they would be your demise. Panic surged through your veins as an untimely pain shot through your head. The pain deafened your ears and delayed your movements. Your battered and weak knees collapsed under the weight of your body when you tried to stand, causing you collapsed to the ground once again. Your vision was blurred but you could see the other candidates run past you, the blood of the fallen stained their feet and left a trail of crimson footsteps in their wake. The adrenaline pumping through your veins made you to climb to your feet and break into a sprint. You gritted your teeth as you endured the pain and ran as hard and fast as you could; but it wasn’t enough.

     You felt a searing pain in your left calf as razor sharp teeth embedded themselves into your tender flesh. A breathless scream ripped itself from your throat as you were dragged to the ground. You twisted your body then came face to face with a massive beast that was ahead of the pack. Black saliva dripped from its mouth as it clenched its oversized jaw, its dagger-like teeth buried themselves deeper into your tender flesh. An ear-piercing scream erupted from your throat. The pain was so intense that you almost blacked out.

     But then a flame of animalistic rage lit inside you. You twisted your body and stabbed the beast’s soulless eye with your finger nails. You bellowed in rage as you plummeted your digits deeper into its eye before completely penetrating it. The accursed demon shrieked in pain as it released your mangled leg from its death grip. You leapt to your feet and ignored the crippling pain and gushes of blood that poured like a fountain from your injured leg.

     As you sprinted for the left door you heard the shouts of the other candidates who had chosen the right path. They banged on the locked door and begged for the person on the other side to let them in. Their cries for mercy turned to gut wrenching screams as they were devoured by the savage mutants. You heard the snarling grow louder and realized that the predators were closing in on you and you knew you wouldn’t be able to escape them a second time. Their massive jaws were inches from your legs as you desperately reached for the knob of the door. You chocked out a sob of relief and gave thanks when the knob turned and you successfully opened the door.

     You entered the room then slammed the door shut, just in time to avoid being eaten alive by the beasts. The door violently shook against their attacks. You knew it wouldn’t hold and you still weren’t safe. There was another door on the other side of the room which you knew was the exit. Your eyes shot around the room and you hastily took in your surroundings. There was a large shelf against the wall filled with liquids and rolls of white material. You limped to the shelf, the pain of your injuries overwhelmed your exhausted body as the adrenaline left your system. Something told you that there would be something to help ease your suffering. You looked down at your injury and your stomach churned when you saw yellow and black puss dripping from your wound.

     You examined the bottles then panicked. There were marking on the bottles but you couldn’t read them. _‘_ _ізапрапілавага_ _спірт’_ was written on one while another read, _‘_ _ácido sulfúrico’._ Tears of frustration streamed down your face as you rummaged through the shelf’s contents and realized that you couldn’t read any of the labels.

     The banging grew louder as the beasts threw themselves against the door. You flinched when a hinge broke from the door. You knew your time was limited and in your desperation you grabbed the first bottle, tore off the lid and pour its contents on your infected wound. An ear-piercing shriek tore itself from your scorched throat as the liquid burned and stung your wound. You fell to the ground and held the mauled flesh in your hands in hope of easing the pain but to no avail. Tears poured from your eyes as you continued to cry out and sob. You looked down at your wound and much to your relief, the grotesque puss had lessened and the flesh looked cleaner.

     You were snapped out of your thoughts when you heard the door slam against its remaining hinges. The beasts had bit and clawed their way through the wood of the door, forming a hole through it. You had just grabbed a scalpel from the shelf when the door split in half and the savage animals broke into the room.

     You grabbed the shelf and slammed it to the floor. The bottles shattered and their contents spilled on the floor. The liquids mixed together and created an acidic and corrosive pool and much to your delight the beasts ran straight into it.  You threw open the second door and refused to watch in satisfaction at the burning of the accursed creatures as they suffered in the acid. Their whines and shrieks of pain was enough for you. Your trap bought you some time and put some distance between you and beasts. Your victory was short lived and your heart sank when you heard them running towards you.

     As you approached the end of the hallway you saw that there was another split, only this time there were three doors. The left and middle door had a person on the other side yelling at you to open their door, promising safety and their help. You glared at them as you remembered their lie and those who had lost their lives in trusting in their counterfeit safety.

     You jerked your body and sprinted to the door to the far right and once again, the knob turned and you entered the room. Like the other, this room had a shelf with unreadable bottles. Since the last liquid had helped your wound, you took a risky gamble and chose another bottle. Unable to read the label, you tore the lid off and poured the content on your wound. You hoped for the best but got the worst.

     The pain tore through your body and you collapsed to the floor. Your senses dulled but you could vaguely hear yourself screaming. Unlike the other, this substance eroded the flesh of the wound and created more putrid puss that released such a foul odor you turned your head and vomited. Your entire body throbbed with pain as you laid on the floor, too exhausted to move a muscle. You heard the muffled sound of the door shake against the threshold, weakened and ready to break at any given second.

     Through all the pain and physical torment, a flame of defiance ignited itself within you and determination surged through your veins. You climbed to your feet, limped over to the shelf, and threw it to the ground again in hopes of it buying you some time.

     You were already out the back door when you heard the pack break into the room. You chocked out a sob of relief when you saw a thick metal door at the end of the hall. There were words above it but like the other markings, you were unable to read them. But it didn’t matter to you, the door was made of metal and was sturdy enough to protect you from the pack. You ran down the hall to the best of your ability but your body had nearly reached its limit. You were halfway down the hall when you were tackled to the ground. You shrieked in pain when you felt several rows of teeth sink into the flesh of your waist. You turned to see your attacker only to realize it was the same beast from earlier. You knew it had come back for revenge. It sank its teeth deeper into your body and you felt yourself on the verge of passing out. You looked at it from your half-closed eyes and saw it smirk in satisfaction at your misery.

     Rage set your body ablaze and brought you back from the verge of death as you twisted your body and slit its nose with the scalpel. The beast roared in pain but refused to let you go which only fueled your wrath. You raised the scalpel above your head, let out a blood curdling scream, then stabbed the beast’s remaining eye. You plummeted and twisted the blade until it finally released your side. You fell to the hard concrete with a thud but forced yourself to your feet and bolted to the metal door. The barking and snarling of the pack closing in on you made you push your body to its breaking point.

     There was a giant red button next to the door which you pressed, then the metal doors parted. You threw yourself into the room and the door shut just in time to save you from the blood lusting savages.

     A light flickered on and you saw that you were in an empty room with yet again, another damn door on the other side. Every fiber of your being demanded you to collapse, to rest, but you refused to allow yourself such a luxury; you knew if you were to lay down, you wouldn’t be able to get up. You dragged yourself to the door and gripped the handle for support while you tried to get some air into your trembling body. The lack of oxygen made you feel lightheaded so you allowed yourself a few moments of rest. Because of your lack of awareness, you failed to notice the piles of bodies in the dark corners of the room.

     Once the dizziness had faded, you turned the knob and entered the new room. It was filled with a pleasant lighting, not too bright nor too dim. There were chairs in the middle and benches lining the perimeter of the room. All around you were the mangled bodies of the living, the survivors. Some were standing, others were sitting, and a few defeated souls allowed themselves the pleasure of laying on the hard floor. Your ears were filled with screams and cries of agony. Your nose was assaulted by the overwhelming metallic scent of blood. You forced yourself to look away from the carnage in front of you; it was too much to bear.

     Refusing to allow yourself to sit down, you settled on leaning against the wall. Your bruised knees and wounded leg screamed at you to sit but you ignored their pleas. You clenched your side and looked down at the wound. The flesh of your side had long, deep gashes where the beast had dragged its teeth into you. You jerked your head to the side and looked away in disgust and gagged when you felt puss ooze down your fingers.

     You were pulled from your misery when a man dressed in a white coat entered the room and announced that anyone who needed medical attention would be offered it. He asked that anyone who was injured to please come with him. Many injured candidates followed the man but you stayed where you were. Something didn’t feel right…your gut instinct had been right about the door, so you chose to trust it again. The poor souls followed the man, some were missing limbs and giant chunks of flesh; their bodies were mutilated, gnarled, disfigured, and all of them sought sanctuary in the man’s promise of receiving help.

_‘No! No don’t follow him! It’s a trick! He’s lying! Don’t follow him!’_ you wanted to scream but you lost your voice and you were frozen in place.

     The hopeful candidates passed through a door the man had led them to. Tears streamed down your face as you watched the misguided souls pass through the threshold. One of the candidates turned their head and made eye contact with you; it was the pretty girl from earlier.

_‘No! Please! Don’t follow him please! Please come back!!’_ you opened your mouth to scream your plea but nothing came out.

     She cradled what was left of her arm as she looked over her shoulder and smiled at you. Half of her face was missing but she was still as pretty as the moment you met her. The thick metal door closed behind her and you cursed your uselessness. You looked around the room at the other candidates that had turned down the offer of medical attention. Their wounds were serious but not life threatening. You spotted the guy who had tried to feed you to the beasts by pushing you to the ground. The bastard had deep gashes on his cheek and a superficial bite wound on his right arm but other than that he was in one piece. You glared at him and spitefully wondered how many had lost their lives so that he could still have his. He turned to meet your malicious glare and sneered, not fond of the fact that you were still alive.

_‘That’s right you little shit I’m still standing.’_ you thought as you spat in his direction. He smirked in amusement. A few moments later, the same suited man from earlier entered the room.

     “Congratulation Gifts!” he beamed at the remaining candidates in the room.

     His overzealous tone was the total opposite of the misery of the room. It was as if he didn’t care about the mangled candidates before him; nor the blood soaked concrete floor nor scent the putrid scent of infected flesh that lingered in the air.

_‘And that damn word, ‘Gift’, what does that even mean?!’_ you thought in frustration but the pain in your head returned. You bit down on your lip to quite yourself.

     “You have successfully completed the first trial and will be advancing to the next challenge!” he announced with outstretched arms but his words made you panic.

_‘Wait, just the candidates in the room passed? What about the people who went to receive medical attention? They passed! They survived! Why is it only us who passed?! Wh-‘_ you grunted as the pain intensified, forcing you dropped the situation and focus on the man’s words.

      “Your guardians will retrieve you and escort you back to your rooms where you will wait for the next test; and remember, only one of you can be the gift to mankind…” he finished his monologue in a sinister tone which contradicted the exaggerated smile he gave the group of bleeding youths afterwards.

     “Guardians…” you repeated in the form of a whisper and on cue, the door opened.

     The guardians entered the room and each retrieved their candidate. They’re faces were inexpressive and their voices were monotone as they completely ignored the injured state of their candidate. Your heart sank when you didn’t see your guardian but you came to life when you finally saw him enter the room. Your silent protector scanned the room for you then froze in place when he found you. Tears of happiness poured from your bloodshot eyes as you choked out a laugh and smiled, limping towards him as quickly as you could.

 

_The Winter Soldier’s mind went blank when he saw you. You-a darling girl who had found such joy in something as simple as a typewriter-limped towards him. Your once white gown was soaked in your blood and smeared with a black ooze that reeked with such a foul odor even he could smell it from behind his mask. You held your side in hopes of slowing the blood that poured from giant gashes and from the way you were limping, he knew you had a similar wound on your leg. The bruises on your knees had doubled in size and he could see the way they shook as they tried to support the weight of your body. Your steps faltered multiple time and the excruciating pain you were suffering from was as obvious as could be; but you staggered towards him as quickly as your broken body could go. Your eyes were bloodshot and streaks of tears covered your bloodied cheeks but you were smiling at him as if he were a blessing in the flesh. From the moment he had met you, he had loved your smile, but now he hated it with a passion. How dare you smile; how dare you smile and feel happy when your body was torn to shreds. He wanted you to cry in pain or be furious or attack a guard, anything but happy. But there you were, bleeding and mangled with a bright smile that rivaled the sun. Your darling smile was contagious and he sorrowfully mimicked the gesture behind his mask, ‘She really is tougher than she looks.’_

     “You’re here! I was afraid you wouldn’t come…” you whispered in a raspy voice as you approached him.

     Your guardian shook his head as he dismissed your fear and reached out for you. You wanted nothing more than to collapse in his arms but you saw him looking around the room at the others. No matter how injured the candidates were, their guardians did nothing to help them in any way. The silent man looked down at you and you nodded in acknowledgment. As much as he wanted to help you, the two of you knew that he couldn’t without drawing the attention of the guards that lingered in the room. His help would only make you stand out from the others; which was the last thing you wanted. It was when the masked man led you out of the room the full intensity of the pain hit you. You whimpered as you forced yourself to focus all your strength in standing and moving your legs. You were a few feet from the door when you started panting, it was as if you couldn’t get enough air in your lungs.

_‘Just make it to the door,’_ you told yourself. Your spirit was strong but your body was weak and you tripped over your trembling legs but luckily caught yourself.

     Your guardian clenched his fists as he watched you from the corner of his eye. Every stagger, every cry filled his heart with hatred; he’d find the person who did this to you and slit their throat.

     You had reached your goal as you stepped out of the door and you almost rewarded yourself by collapsing, but your attention shifted to focus on your guardian. Your heart sank as he walked ahead and disappeared around the corner. You cried out in fear that he had left you behind, but you perked up and smiled when you saw him stick out his hand and wave to you. You giggled at the cute gesture but your happiness was short lived when you felt your body swaying. Your vision was blurring and your body had gone numb from all the pain. The panting and cries grew louder and louder with every step you took but you forced your trembling legs to continue forward. When you rounded the corner, you finally allowed yourself the privilege of collapsing; but instead of the cold hard concrete, you felt the warm arms of your guardian catch you.

     He gently wrapped your arm around his neck and held your waist to support you but after taking a couple of steps, you began sobbing from the pain of your injured side rubbed against him. The masked man cursed under his breath when he felt just how weak you were. You had already lost a significant amount of blood and he knew you couldn’t hold on much longer, so he switched to Plan B.

     A surprised gasp left you as your guardian scooped you into his arms. If you weren’t on the brink of death you would have blushed but shyness was honestly the last thing on your mind. He placed his gloved hand on your injured side to help slow the bleeding. You bit down on your bottom lip to keep yourself from screaming. Your guardian held you close to his hard body. You rested your head on his strong chest as he ran through the maze-like building. His footsteps were silent but he stopped at every corner and peeked his head out to make sure the coast was clear. If anyone found the two of you in this position…the consequences were unknown but it obviously wouldn’t be good. The masked brunette stopped dead in his tracks when he heard guards approaching. He luckily found a small dark niche to hide in. He pressed you closer to his body and you bit your lip and gripped the material of his suit to keep yourself from crying out.

     “This is all of them right?” a guard asked.

     “Yep. To be honest I was expecting more, but I guess these kids are better than we thought,” the other joked and the rest laughed in amusement.

     “Shame they’re so gullible though…” one of them commented.

     As they came closer you heard something being dragged. You shifted in your guardian’s hold as you tried to see what they were dragging, but the small space in the niche you were hidden in made it difficult to see anything. There were seven guards that were dragging seven large black bags. You narrowed your eyes in confusion but the realization hit you when you saw the familiar sight of shining black locks hanging out from the zipper of a black bag.

    Your hand flew up to cover your mouth and keep yourself from screaming. You fell limp in your guardian’s arms as you realized the fate of the candidates who had sought medical attention;

_‘The doctor killed them…’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Regarding the chpt:  
> -This was chpt was really fun to write!  
> -I'm not really into gorey stuff but this series is going to have a lot of it. So, what I have decided to do is try to focus more on the emotional/actual physical pain rather than just writing about the blood and guts on the floor :/
> 
> Thank you so much for all the support!!ヽ(*´∀`)ﾉﾞ  
> Comment/Kudo to let me know how you liked it!! ;DD


	5. Please Don't be a Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Don’t be afraid,” you whispered in a small voice.

I have survived,

but I have not been spared.

-Catherynne M. Valente

Deathless

 

~

 

_Somethings aren’t meant to be heard;_

_This was one of them._

 

      _The Winter Soldier’s mind went blank when he realized the ‘consequence’ of a candidate failing a trial. He had heard the phrase ‘only one of you can be the gift to mankind’ multiple times but he had never thought that the cost of failure was the life of the candidate. The assassin was snapped out of his thoughts when he felt you go limp in his arms. Your body lay listless, as if you were a lifeless doll. Your head fell back and your face was frozen in a horrified expression, tears streamed from your widened (e/c) eyes. Your lips were slightly parted but your chest was still. Much to his horror, you weren’t breathing. Your guardian cursed under his breath. The mixture of shock and loss of blood was a fatal combination. He poked his head out of the niche to make sure the coast was clear before bolting for the room the pair of you shared. He looked down at the mortified expression that your face was frozen in then cupped the back of your head and held your body closer to his chest. He came to a halt when he reached the door to the room and quickly punched in a series of numbers, opening the thick metal door. The assassin bolted inside then-gently as he could-laid you on your bed and went to gather the supplies he needed to clean your injuries. He looked back at your lifeless form then your wounds. The brunette scrunched his face in disgust and dread; this wasn’t going to be easy._

     Everything that happened after the horror dawned on you was a blur. The last thing you remembered was falling into a pair of strong and warm arms. Your eyes were wide open but you couldn’t see anything. All of your senses had shut down from the shock. You vaguely felt the man running then cup the back of your head and held your body close to his chest but that was about it. Your guardian shifted your spiritless form then you heard the muffled sound of beeping and the thick door open. You felt yourself being gently lowered to a hard surface then heard the sound of receding footsteps.

     In reality you laid there for just a few seconds but in your state of dissociation it felt like years. Time didn’t seem to exist and you feared you would rot in this realm of nothingness for the rest of eternity. It was when you felt something stroke your face that your eyes finally refocused and you saw the most beautiful sight in the world; your guardian. His eyes were concealed by a pair of black goggles and the rest of his face was covered by a menacing mask but he was still such a beautiful sight to behold.

     Your body jolted as a deep gasp filled your long-deprived lungs with oxygen. Thick tears fell from your eyes as your body shook uncontrollably. You reached out for the intimidating man. He gently took your outstretched hand in his and cupped your face with his human hand in hopes of calming you. Sobs wracked through you. Your body rose and fell from the bed as you tried to regain control of it.

     “Y-You came f-for me!” you managed to say in between your sobs and gasps for air. He nodded in response and squeezed your hand. A pained smile stretched across your face but then a horrid thought came to mind.

     “You’re no-not a d-dream are y-you?” you coughed and winced at the pain in your chest, dreading his answer.

      The masked man pulled your hand and placed it on his chest, right above his heart to prove he was truly there in the flesh. You sobbed out a sigh of relief. Your body eventually stilled but the pain from your wounds made it difficult to concentrate. You cried out when he rose from his kneeling position and left your side but smiled when he returned. The brunette held a large white box in his hands and you knew what was to come. You turned your head to the side and focused on the feeling of the course pillow scratch against your sweaty skin while he prepped the supplies. You opened your eyes and saw him holding a piece of a leather belt close to your mouth. The pain clouded your mind but you knew he meant for you to place it in between your teeth, which you did. You whimpered when his warm hand left your cold body and you mourned the loss. You turned your head and bit down on the belt in fear when you saw him take out a scalpel and white cloth. You dreaded what was to come, but knew it had to be done.

     Your guardian knelt in front of your injured leg. His metal hand held the scalpel and his human hand held yours in a tight grip. He looked at your trembling form; he could already see bite marks on the belt as you clenched your jaw in fear. The tears streaming down your pretty face broke his heart. The masked man grinded his teeth in hatred and swore to kill whoever did this to you.

      He didn’t want to do this. He really didn’t want to do this, but when he looked at your festering wound, he knew he had to.

You squeezed your eyes shut in preparation of the upcoming agony. Your fist had gone numb from your iron grip on the white sheet below you. You wondered how the man could withstand your intense grip on his human hand. As time dragged on you cursed everything in the world and wished your guardian would just get it over with. But the flame of your annoyance was dowsed by fear when you realized what was coming. You bit down harder on the belt (if that was possible) when you heard the masked man shift and lean towards you. Your eyes had sealed themselves shut but you felt his gloved hand tuck a wet (h/c) lock away from your sweaty forehead and gently push it behind your ear. He then caressed your tear soaked cheek and you melted into his touch. Your eyes were still shut when you felt him move closer to you and even through his thick suit, you could feel the warmth radiating from his body.

      “I’m so sorry.” he whispered against your temple.

      You choked out a sob when you heard his voice; it was perfect in every way and you wanted to hear it again and again. But your yearning was abruptly cut short when he moved back to your leg and everything went white.

      The searing pain that pulsated from your leg made your body jerk up off the bed in hopes of escaping the pain but your guardian held down your body with his human arm. Your screams were muffled by the belt you clenched in between your teeth but they were blood curdling none the less.

      Your guardian cursed under his breath when he cut open the wound. He had anticipated the wound to be serious, but not this serious. He resisted the urge to gag at the putrid smell of the puss that oozed from the cut dripped onto the white cloth he held below the injury. The masked man held down your body with his human arm as you thrashed about, your muffled screams and sobs made his stomach churn. It was difficult, but he forced himself to continue drawing out the yellow and black puss. Once puss had been milked from the wound, the brunette busied himself with cleansing the laceration with a heavy disinfectant. You sobbed through clenched teeth but you seemed to be familiar with this form of pain. He pressed a white cloth against the wound to stop the bleeding, then went back to disinfect it again before grabbing a needle and thread to sew the gash shut. Once he had finished the stitches and cut the thread, he looked over to your face. Your chest was heaving from all the screaming and sobbing and your knuckles had turned white from the iron grip you had on the sheets below you. Your head was lulled to the side, your empty gaze was transfixed on the bland, white wall. Your once shining eyes had dulled and he’d give anything to bring the light back to them.

      You hated yourself for not passing out; if you had, the pain wouldn’t have been so intense. You yearned and begged your body to succumb to fatigue but the throbbing pulsating from your side made it impossible. The masked man wrapped your leg in a sterile white wrap and moved to be face to face with the deep gashes that had shredded the flesh of your waist and lower rib. It took all your strength to turn your head and look at him. Your gown had been torn during your escape from the beast and now offered little coverage in the mid region of your body. The sharp cold air of the room made the exposed skin (what was left of it) prickle into goosebumps. You winced when your aching body shivered.

      The blood and puss soaked garment had to be removed if he was going to be able to treat the wound that laid beneath. The thought of laying completely naked on a bed before such a handsome man should have made you flustered but at this point you were too weak to care. Your silent guardian looked up at you, silently ask for permission. You gave a weak nod of consent. The stoic, yet considerate, man pulled the sheets up to cover the lower half of your body then removed a pillow case and covered your breasts with the material. Your body was covered for the sake of modesty, only your waist and stomach were visible. The honorable man looked at you again and you once again consented. He reached over and ripped the remains of your gown and removed them from your broken body. You bit down on the belt and reassured yourself that it was the material of the gown that had ripped, not your flesh.

      Although you were partially covered, you shivered as the cold air assaulted your exposed midsection. The man silently prepped everything for the cleansing of your second wound as you prepped yourself for the pain. You knew this injury would hurt more than the one on your leg but at this point you didn’t give a damn. The puss and black saliva from the beast would kill you if they weren’t removed. There was no other option. Truth be told you just wanted to get this over with. You shut your eyes and prepared yourself for the incoming agony.

      Several moments passed and you feared that the wound was too serious to treat. You opened your eyes and looked over to your guardian who was kneeling by your side. He had the scalpel and cloth of disinfectant ready but his body was frozen as he stared at the gashes in your side. You knew why he was hesitating.

 

_The Winter Soldier was an assassin; not a doctor. He tortured himself with doubts and the consequences of making a mistake. The infected gashes were so close to your vital organs, one mistake and you were a goner. He shut his eyes and clenched his jaw, he knew he was your only hope. He knew that no doctors would come and knew the consequences of seeking ‘medical attention’. The assassin knew that the stakes were high and your precious life laid in his filthy hands. He would never consciously admit it, but he was afraid. It was easy to take a life, but so hard to save one. The masked man cursed everything and allowed doubt and fear to creep into his nonexistent heart. He cursed the entire twisted system of the trials and the people who put you through this. He cursed his uncertainty and his lack of basic knowledge of giving medical attention. He cursed his inability to give you the treatment you needed and his hesitation. He cursed-_

_The assassin was snapped out of his spiteful thoughts of self-loathing when he felt a soft hand brush an auburn strand from his sweaty forehead and push it behind his ear. His head shot up to look at you. You-the darling soul who found beauty in his withered leather journal and musty old books-gazed at him with half lidded eyes that shone with benevolence. Your exhaustion was as clear as day but your weak smile lit the room and filled it with heavenly radiance. The tenderness of your gaze soothed his burning soul and cleared his clouded mind._

_“Don’t be afraid,” you whispered in a small voice._

_The tormented man’s lips stretched into a sorrowful smile at your words. Even at a time like this, you were able to show compassion and consideration. Your words were laced with a hint of playfulness which made the man’s smile grow and comfort his distressed soul. It filled him with determination and confidence. Your hand rested itself against his covered face and he rubbed his concealed cheek into your palm. He couldn’t feel your skin, but he knew it was soft. You smiled at him and repeated your previous reaffirmation which gave him the confidence to continue;_

_“Don’t be afraid.”_

      The pain that followed set your body ablaze and plummeted your mind into oblivion. A thousand images flashed through your broken mind as your body thrashed and attempted to break away from your guardian’s hold. The belt finally split in half and fell from your mouth as ear piercing screams ripped themselves from your scorched throat. The events of earlier came to life and you relived the horrid physical and mental agony you had suffered. You saw the ghastly white walls of the hallway and the blood soaked floor. The mangled bodies of the candidates-that had believed the lie of the door to their salvation would open-littering the floor. You saw the pretty girl and her pretty hair and her pretty face before it had been deformed by the merciless jaws of the ravenous beasts. Her shining brown eyes suddenly dulled as her lifeless body was tossed into a black bag as if she were nothing more than a piece of garbage. A scream louder than all the others erupted from your throat as your head threw itself back against the stiff pillow.

      “IT’S MY FAULT! IT’S MY FAULT SHE’S DEAD! SHE’S DEAD BECAUSE OF ME!” you shrieked and wailed as thick tears poured from your bloodshot eyes. You vaguely felt your guardian reach out and squeeze your hand, he said something but his words were drowned out by your ceaseless sobbing.

      You shut your eyes in attempted to block the maniacal memories and delusions but when you opened them you were face to face with the beast that had tried to devour you. It stared down at you with bleeding, empty eye sockets and you knew it had hunted you down to finish what it had started.

      You reached up to try to claw the beast with your nails in hopes of hurting it but your feeble attack only made its jaws stretch into a monstrous smirk, exposing all of its jagged, rotting, spear-like teeth. You shrieked when it opened its jaw to devour your face but instead of being stabbed by rows of razor like teeth, a gloved hand stroked your cheek. A second hand reached out to cup your other cheek and you were pulled out of your hallucination and back to reality. Your eyes refocused and instead of an eyeless beast, you came face to face with your masked guardian. He stroked your cheek in circular motions and your entire body fell back against the hard bed as you choked out a sob of happiness.

      “It’s y-you!” you exclaimed in a raspy voice before breaking into a fit of coughs.

      Once you had regained your composure, you looked back at him and managed to smile. A man you barely knew, had gritted through the horrible procedure of cleaning and sewing up your wounds, and even though it was hell, you were forever grateful to him. Fear crept into your heart as you realized that he could just be another hallucination. You opened your mouth to ask him but he had anticipated your question;

      “I’m not a dream, I’m real,” the man reassured you in a deep and soothing voice.

      It took all your remaining strength to touch the gloved hand that held your cheek. Exhaustion finally claimed your body as the world began to fade. You smiled at him one last time before closing your eyes and submitting to sleep. You felt every muscle in your broken body relax as you felt yourself drift into a welcoming state of unconsciousness. Before you left reality completely, you felt him rest his forehead against yours and heard him whisper;

 

_“I’m proud of you.”_

 

        

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chpt woot! ヽ(*´∀`)ﾉﾞ  
> Rewriting this series is really fun (now that I actually know where it's going haha). Next chpt will be up ASAP!! :DD

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Disclaimer: I do not own anything Marvel related, nor do I own you the reader, (all of you are lovely, strong, and independent!!)  
> I own nothing but my writing which is a work of fiction.


End file.
